Published on October 1, 2005 By drmiler In Humor
Many of us "Old Folks" (those over 50, WAY over 50, or hovering near 50) are quite confused about how we should present ourselves. We are unsure about the kind of image we are projecting and whether or not we are correct as we try to Conform to current fashions. Despite what you may have seen on the streets, the following combinations DO NOT go together And should be avoided:

1. A nose ring and bifocals
2. Spiked hair and bald spots
3. A pierced tongue and dentures
4. Miniskirts and support hose
5. Ankle bracelets and corn pads
6. Speedo's and cellulite
7. A belly button ring and a gall bladder surgery scar
8. Unbuttoned disco shirts and a heart monitor
9. Midriff shirts and a midriff bulge
10. Bikinis and liver spots
11. Short shorts and varicose veins
12. Inline skates and a walker

And last, but not least...my personal favorite

13. Thongs and Depends

Comments
on Oct 01, 2005
bump
on Oct 01, 2005
A tattoo on the small of the back and a back brace?
on Oct 01, 2005
Ewww...thanks for the visual...not.

How about altzheimers and SUVs?

Pierced ears and hearing aids...

Viagra and prostate cancer...

Cataracts and any car!

$200 Name Brand running shoes and a walker!

Breast implants with a portable oxygen tank...

Oh stop me before I sin again! Hahahahaha


Very good whip. Now go and sin no more.
on Oct 01, 2005
' 6. Speedo's and cellulite'
Agreed. But oldies are not the only culprits here. Try pointing out this fashion faut pas to overweight teenagers!
on Oct 01, 2005
Oh God, I love all these, thank you so much for the insane cackling eminating from my throat.
on Oct 02, 2005
' 6. Speedo's and cellulite'
Agreed. But oldies are not the only culprits here. Try pointing out this fashion fax pa to overweight teenagers!


Actually a "very" astute call!
on Oct 02, 2005

7. A belly button ring and a gall bladder surgery scar

 

Hey now!  I had both of those and nobody complained! (I had my galld bladder out laprascopically so I've only got 3 little scars about 1/2" long.)

 

 

on Oct 02, 2005
,
number 7 and number 12 are me........
needed this giggle mucho today!
on Oct 02, 2005
Thongs and depends?  You are a sick puppy!
on Oct 03, 2005
Major funny! And oh so true..........and sad!
I am an observer of people and our youth (anyone under 29) are more and more, becoming very out-of-shape, overweight and don't seem to care a lot about it....
In a health club I belong to, 1/2 of the clients are teens (later years) and young adults, "extremely out of shape" can't imagine how or why they are so out of shape.....
I know they have influences in the lives (parents, relatives) and many others, I ask myself, doesn't anyone love these people?, enough to really help them, to teach them, (show by example how to live) how to eat right, get up off their butts and move, everyday, many times a day!!!
It's really sad, I have trained some of these beautiful people, just dying to unzip their shells and step out....
I always try to make it fun and I[I] let them talk, (seems nobody is listening to them, except their friends).....
Too much thought and pain is put into matters of the flesh, they would be better served to find and develope a "true" zest for life and love the skin they are in and all the rest kind of falls into place, (with little help)
I have really enjoyed this article and the comments, Thank you
on Oct 03, 2005
Oh boy, these are sooo funny! Thanks for the laugh!